Monday, October 29, 2007

UPDATE: Traffic Bizarreness

UPDATE: I've had another ten or fifteen people get here by googling the below phrase since I posted this. Seriously, what gives... my mind is spinning all these crazy scenarios about classic rock-loving, date-specific serial killers and how I'm being drawn ever closer into their evil clutches.

P.S. Don't you love how I've turned something so innocuous into a scary plot against me? I'm either a paranoid psychotic or a guy with an ego larger than most people's apartments. Which is it??? Ooooh, we may never know, but it sure is fun to guess!!!

P.P.S. Me!!! ME!!! ME!!! ME!!!


Okay, so I've had about twenty people today arrive at ZFS! by googling this exact phrase:

bob, segers, night, moves, was, released, what, year, numerical

Um... what gives? I know I spoke about this song recently, but I'm hardly the only person on the internet to ever mention "Night Moves." Also, why this phrase, specifically? I'm starting to think that a group of Bob Seger fact-fiends (who seem to be mostly Canadian) are plotting to have me killed, so please, somebody crack this case before I flip out and barricade myself in my office's bathroom. It's gross in there, guys, don't make me do it.


Blogger Big Daddy said...

I don't know about that, but I find it creepy you posted about Porter Wagoner last week, and now he's dead!

3:09 PM  
Blogger Ben K. said...

Someone on the Internets is abusing the comma.

3:38 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Big Daddy... I would just like to point out, again, that I had nothing to do with Porter Wagoner's untimely death. Well, actually his death was pretty timely... he was 80 and life-long smoker... but still.

Ben K... When I first read your comment, I read it as, "Someone on the internets is abusing the coma." And then I got even more creeped out about the whole situation. Then I re-read and, yes, there's just too many commas in that search query. Again, though, it's multiple people searching for this. Very, very odd.

3:45 PM  
Blogger Sally Tomato said...

Many, many people travel to mine thanks to "chocolate pussy" (which refers to Trader Joe's cookies, not snapper). Today's was "fresh chocolate pussy". I wonder what that person was *really* after...

3:52 PM  
Anonymous stew said...

First of all, I really hope my obituary doesn't refer to my (already discussed) death and subsquent eating of my dead body by my cats as a "timely death."

Secondly, yeah, a Canadian fatwa was issued today for whatever infidel posts Bob Seger's Night Moves year released in a numerical fashion. supposedly that person defames Mohammed and Mounties and stuff, and needs to be found and immediately brought to a timely end. Sucks that it's you.

Say hi to Porter in heaven for me.

4:03 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Sally... Um... okay, so how exactly does "chocolate pussy" relate to Trader Joe's cookies? And are they delicious?

Stew... Something tells me you're kidding. Also, I meant "untimely." I think. I don't know. I'm pretty drunk, so...

4:05 PM  
Blogger Dre said...

this is all i have to offer:

"I like to take your records and i throw them in the trash
i wanna cut your brakes and make your tour bus crash
you think you're like a rocker i dont get you any how
Kill Bob Seger right now, Kill Bob Seger right now!"

-the briefs

4:10 PM  
Blogger Sally Tomato said...

@Clinton: read all about it:

4:14 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Dre... This is the first time that The Briefs have been mention on ZFS!, and it's been long overdue. Thank you sir (madame?)

Sally... Ah, well there you go. Not at all the scenario I had in mind, though I'm still going to write it out and send it to Penthouse. I'll make The Forum one of these days!!!

4:21 PM  
Anonymous David said...

How can you be drunk its only 4????

4:55 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

It's possible, David, that I was just kidding.

4:56 PM  
Blogger Big Daddy said...

I used to know a drag queen named 'Chocolate Thunder Pussy'.

Maybe they were looking for her.

5:01 PM  
Anonymous David said...

I had a boss like you once. He would always joke around and pretend to be yelling at you then he would start laughing. Then when he was really yelling at you , you would start laughing thinking he was only joking which would make him angry because this time he was serious. So then everyone was never sure what was going on with him. You remind me of him.

6:13 PM  
Blogger Dre said...

the briefs, while hating bob seger and wanting him dead, are very cool. and fun.

i's a lady.

7:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have a visitor tracker? I would like to find out where to get one. Please thank you.

5:49 AM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Big Daddy... She sounds like a sweet lady.

David... (sigh)

Dre... Yeah, you gotta love any band that has a member named Steve E. Nix. Also, congrats on being a lady!

Babe... Over on the right hand side of my blog, you'll see a button that's got a blue Saturn-looking thing on it. Click that, and you should be able to figure out from there how to secure a tracker.

8:46 AM  
Blogger brookLyn gaL said...

I get the most hits due to people googling the lyrics to "Friday, I'm in Love", which I once posted. I worry because- seriously, how do you NOT know the lyrics?

12:56 PM  

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