Friday Afternoon Hodgepodge

My friend Michael gave me a B-12 vitamin pill and I also popped some DayQuil and drank like a gallon of orange juice, so I'm hoping that maybe they'll all act together like a germ-fighting team of superheroes and beat back the evil villain known as Baron von My Cold. Remains to be seen, I guess, but here's hoping. The DayQuil, by the way, is the Human Torch because they're the same color. Also, I lit the DayQuil on fire before I swallowed it. Because I am extreme. To the max. Etc.

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I had this pizza for lunch from my work's cafeteria and, weirdness, it was topped with chopped up breakfast sausages. I guess they had some leftover from this morning. At least I *hope* they were from this morning. I don't mind telling you that I've been rocking a healthy case of the poots ever since I ate it, which very well could be the overture for a full bore symphony of doo-doo browns. But hopefully not. I don't need that right now, what with the epic battle between good and evil going on inside my admittedly roomy frame.

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Greatest movie ever?

It's really nice to see that What The Fuck Studios is still pumping out their usual high-quality, monkey-related fare. Also, it's good to see Jason London getting some work. Maybe he'll finally realize all the promise he showed in such diverse fare as Alien Cargo, Alien Vs. Alien, and A Midsummer Night's Rave. Keep shootin' for the moon, J-Lond!!! And watch out for that monkey; he's a ninja!!!

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I know you can't see it or anything, but seriously, my hair is doing some things today that have never before been documented in the annals of human history. Yesterday it was fine, but now I look like Brian Setzer's fat brother who doesn't "Stray Cat Strut" so much as he does "Stray Cat Sit Around The Trailer And Eat Cheez-Its While Failing To Solve The Puzzles On Wheel Of Fortune." It also looks a bit like Conway Twitty's hair during his Twitty City days. I'm terrified to see what it's going to look like tomorrow. High-top fade? Dreadlocks? Bald, save for a ponytail at the brain stem that's supposed to be all Shaolin Way of the Fist but actually just makes you look like a douchebag that lives with your parents and thinks tits are from Narnia? Who knows, kids... who knows?