Friday, May 09, 2008

Pot Head

Three teenagers were arrested this week for attempting to use a corpse’s skull as a bong. Let me say that again... teenagers, corpses head, bong. Chew on that for a second.

Now, without clicking on the article, guess where this happened:

A) In a Dean Koontz short story
B) In the dark second-half of the new Harold & Kumar flick
C) In a sheet-drenching nightmare
D) In Texas

Okay, time's up. Let me tally the results here...

Looks like everyone came up with the same answer: In Texas! And you're correct, you smart fucking people. Because Texas is where the freaks live and work and do their freaky shit in the graveyards at night under a harvest moon.

Seriously, and I mean this... you're killing me, home state. It's getting real fucking hard to defend you when you keep pulling shit like this. I think I'm going to start telling people I'm from Hawaii or something, because they don't use cemeteries like head shops over there. I assume. God, tell me I'm right; I don't want to have to pretend to be Canadian. I don't care for hockey.


Anonymous JustinS said...

That is so fucking sweet. I'm just seeing a couple of pot heads stranded on an island, staring at each other and envisioning packing a bowl in the other dude's skull... You know, like how cartoon characters always start imagining that the other one is a leg of lamb or a Crunch Wrap Supreme when they get hungry? Like that.

'Cept with skull bongs.

3:27 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Hey don't blame them for trying such a crazy thing. I think they got the idea from Harry Potter©®. He used that method to talk to his long dead parents. At least they did not kill anyone to get the skull which they would have done in Hawaii.

4:32 PM  
Blogger Lioux said...

I've heard Texas considers unlicensed delivery of grain and depositing grain without a title as a medium severity felony offense – higher than attempted indecency with a child, three or more convictions for driving while intoxicated, and smuggling illegal immigrants.

Just sayin'.

Have an AWESOME weekend!

4:40 PM  
Blogger stew said...

oh, fuck.

Um, can anyone here help me clean up some accidentally deposited grain?


11:02 AM  
Blogger Todd said...

Is it still cool to blame Marilyn Manson for this kind of thing?

4:04 PM  
Blogger brookLyn gaL said...

Are you telling me that you weren't responsible for teaching them to do this?

11:20 AM  

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