Sunday, November 11, 2007

Not Worth Your Valuable Time


Zzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... (cough, rolls over)... Zzzzzzzzzzzz.... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzhmghp... Oh hey, looks, it's Edward Norton. Wow, he seems really miscast in this roll. I mean, he's trying to be all brooding and mysterious, but he's really just coming across like a 17-year-old kid in a High School drama department who just read a book about method acting and is attempting to "re-live" the experience of that one time when he wore his Dad's leather jacket to school and girls.... hmmm... getting sleepy... (yawn)... hmm... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.... Zzzzzzzzzzmgph... What, what's happening.... Oh, it's Jessica Biel. Too bad her acting ability isn't on par with the stellar quality of her ass. That is a fiiiine ass. And... yet... I can't seem to stay... awake... Zzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... God, this movie is so pretentious, I think it might actually try to give itself a blowjob before the credits roll... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Man, Paul Giamatii is the only person actually trying to put forth a good performance... run, Paul, run... NO! Not towards a shitty holiday-themed movie, they're going to make you be Santa Claus... Paul, why... why... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Just in case you missed it, I thought The Illusionist was mad boring, yo!!! True dat... true dat, indeed.

8 Comments:

Blogger skinbeatergreg said...

I, too, fell for the hype. I thought: American History X meets Finding Neverland. God, sometimes I'm such a fool!

12:17 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

I know, right? I usually really like Edward Norton (The 25th Hour is one of the most underrated movies of this decade) but he was just awful in this. Like I said, though, it wasn't really his fault... he should have never been cast in this particular role in the first place.

1:18 PM  
Anonymous highonmoxie said...

i didn't know what to be more ashamed of: the fact that i watched it, or edward norton's sad little "european" accent. it was just...bad. and boy(friend) liked it! ich!

11:03 AM  
Blogger brookLyn gaL said...

I can't wait to see it now! I love movies that have zzzzzz's!

11:11 AM  
Blogger Todd said...

I liked The Prestige loads better.

2:01 PM  
Blogger Kitty said...

this movie was about as good as The Number 23.

2:10 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Moxie... To the curb with him!

Brooklyn... Bring a comfy pillow.

Todd... Word to that. The Prestige totally jammed this movie, hardcore.

Kitty... I disagree, though I get your meaning. The Illusionist was merely boring and pretentious. The Number 23 was an unwatchable mess of epic proportions. I could at least finish The Illusionist.

2:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jessica Biel zzzzzz???? You need more sleep.

6:59 PM  

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