Sunday, March 15, 2009

In Case You're Wondering What Variety of Off-Brand Dr. Pepper I'm Drinking...


Ah, Dr. Skipper... it tastes like if Dr. Pepper and a bottle of cough syrup got blended together with a ground-up poor person. It also kind of tastes like the tears of an orphan; one who's got a lot of health problems and thinks learning how to read is just a lie the TV told.
Serving Suggestions for Dr. Skipper:
-Serve Dr. Skipper in a rusty tin can, lukewarm, while the bank takes back your house.
-Why not drink a can of Dr. Skipper while you wait for your test results to come back? (I'm sorry, you have tuberculosis)
-Fill a shoe with Dr. Skipper. Drink it down. Eat the shoe, but don't eat ALL the shoe. That shoe is dinner for the next couple of days. Dr. Skipper made the shoe taste terrible.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Eric the BeehiveHairdresser said...

Do they do Dr. Skipper Bombs down there too?

11:26 PM  
Blogger Em said...

In my hometown fake Dr. Pepper was known as Dr. Thunder.

12:01 AM  
Blogger Digital Fortress said...

You would think a drink made by someone with a doctorate in maritime studies would have a more refined and sophisticated taste.

10:03 AM  
Blogger Bill From Gainesville said...

I don't think its a coincidence that Barbies little sister was named Skipper and now this knock off beverage is also named Skipper - I think Barbie and Dr. Pepper may have been getting it on

9:17 PM  
Blogger LSL said...

The hair. I love the hair.

11:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what does this have to do with like... ANYTHING???



PS... WHY DO YOU HATE POOR PEOPLE????

6:28 PM  

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