Updates From a Man in Transition

-Part 1 of the big move went great... Girlfriend is now settled in her stylin' new digs, the cat has stopped freaking out about being in unfamiliar territory, and the only thing left to make this house a home is for the Time Warner guy to put in an appearance and hook up the sweet, blessed cable TV. We're working off the wall antennae right now... basically just getting the major networks, plus TBS... and seriously, those guys air a LOT of bullshit. I mean it's cool because I can still watch American Idol and Simpsons reruns, but for fucks sake have you ever actually WATCHED The Today Show? With Al Roker and Meredith Viera? I've got it on in the background right now and it reminds me of when I was a waiter, every once in a while I'd get a table that thought they were HILARIOUS and would always make FUNNY JOKES about EVERYTHING, "Hey your name's Clinton... Where's Hillary... I didn't vote for ya... HAR HAR!!!" etc. The gang on The Today Show is like a group of "funny customers" that won't stop fucking around and just give you their goddamned appetizer order so you can get back to the kitchen for the rest of your section's entrees. Anyway, I hate them and wish nothing but plague and darkness upon their various households.

-I just realized that I'm going to have to re-pack my suitcase because, A) I forgot all about the clothes that I had in the dirty laundry, and B) I did a really horrible job of packing the first time. I kinda just threw stuff in there all willy-nilly; very much a "we've got to skip town because the landlord called INS on us" type of suitcase-filling scenario. So, needless to say, I'll be putting that off 'til the last minute because, ugh, packing is lame times your mom. Hey, can your Mom come pack my suitcase? That'd be awesome if she could. I will not pay her.

-My flight leaves day after tomorrow (Thursday). The fact that I'm actually leaving New York doesn't seem real yet. I mean, it does and it doesn't. Six months ago, I would never have thought I'd be moving back to Arlington. Then again, six months ago I would have never thought I could kill a hobo in cold blood with my bare hands, but hey... this hobo-skin suit I'm wearing certainly speaks to the fact that anything is possible. Still, though; going back home to start my life over. Never thought I'd be that guy. Then again, seems there's quite a lot of "those guys (and gals)" out there these days, so at least I'm in good company.

-More updates as things develop, or if anything of note happens along the way. If not, I'll catch you all again on Texas time. Stay beautiful, kiddos.