Bloggin' - A Behind the Scenes Peek (and some other crap too!)
Thing is... I'm unmotivated to finish ALL THREE of them. I am also uninspired. And unwashed (but that's always). Unpantsed, too. Oh, and I'm always un-not-handsome. (that means I'm totally handsome)
So, I'm going to tell you my ideas and then you can tell me which one of them you'd MOST like to see. We'll do a poll! Or something not so lame. A raffle? That's not quite right.
Well anyway, here's my three post ideas... U Pick-'Em:
1. A post that spoofs the current, creepy Twilight trend of turning monsters into hearthrobs that junior high chicks want to nail; it involves a romantic mummy.
2. A post about what if celebrities were sandwiches.
3. A post that's a hypothetical interview about the upcoming Apocalypse with Lord Humongous from Road Warrior.
The third one is the one that's the most done, the second one is really just in the conceptual stage, and for the first one, all I've done is pick out a bunch of pictures of mummies.
Also, let me say this: IF ANY OF YOU STEAL MY IDEAS FOR POSTS, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN IN THE DESERT LIKE A CRAZY BILLIONAIRE. I OWN SEVERAL GUNS (well, I can throw a rock pretty hard) AND I WILL KILL YOU IN YOUR FACE!!!
So that's kind of where I'm at today. Also... and this is a wild topic-switch but fuck it, it's my blog, I can do whatever the hell I want... I've got athlete's foot.
Athlete's Foot... me... the least athletic person on the planet that's not currently the subject of a freak show documentary on The Learning Channel. I don't know how this happened. I haven't been running wind sprints with plastic bags around my feet. I haven't been trudging through the swamps of Vietnam. I haven't recently let my toes rest in a rich slurry of top soil, sleet, and manure.
So what gives? Why you fucking with me, my feet? Just who exactly do you think you are???
Man, I don't even know what's going on anymore. The world is just crazy. Feet be hurtin', blog be giving me troubles, there's a dead guy in my hallway that I'm pretty sure I killed in a dream BUT NOW HE'S REAL!!! (don't want to get into it)
Life, man... am I right?!?!
But how are you doing. Let's have a conversation. About the aforementioned blog posts, yes, but about YOU as well. How's your life in this, these troubled times? Let's get a dialogue going! Let's connect on an emotional level, guys!!! We can DO THIS!!!
"Hello, readers... I'm C-dog, as you know. I am pretty awesome, but could stand to be a lot awesomer. I'm eating Salt & Vinegar chips right now."
Now you go. I eagerly await your reply.