Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Bloggin' - A Behind the Scenes Peek (and some other crap too!)

Kiddos, here's the scoop: I've been working on a few different blog posts lately that I just... for whatever reason (lack of talent and/or drive)... can't seem to finish. All three of them have the potential to be, to varying degrees, pretty amusing and I think you'd probably like them if I were to actually wrap them up and post them on this blog that you're reading right now. (ZFS!)

Thing is... I'm unmotivated to finish ALL THREE of them. I am also uninspired. And unwashed (but that's always). Unpantsed, too. Oh, and I'm always un-not-handsome. (that means I'm totally handsome)

(LADIES...)

So, I'm going to tell you my ideas and then you can tell me which one of them you'd MOST like to see. We'll do a poll! Or something not so lame. A raffle? That's not quite right.

Well anyway, here's my three post ideas... U Pick-'Em:

1. A post that spoofs the current, creepy Twilight trend of turning monsters into hearthrobs that junior high chicks want to nail; it involves a romantic mummy.

2. A post about what if celebrities were sandwiches.

3. A post that's a hypothetical interview about the upcoming Apocalypse with Lord Humongous from Road Warrior.

The third one is the one that's the most done, the second one is really just in the conceptual stage, and for the first one, all I've done is pick out a bunch of pictures of mummies.

Also, let me say this: IF ANY OF YOU STEAL MY IDEAS FOR POSTS, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN IN THE DESERT LIKE A CRAZY BILLIONAIRE. I OWN SEVERAL GUNS (well, I can throw a rock pretty hard) AND I WILL KILL YOU IN YOUR FACE!!!

So that's kind of where I'm at today. Also... and this is a wild topic-switch but fuck it, it's my blog, I can do whatever the hell I want... I've got athlete's foot.

Athlete's Foot... me... the least athletic person on the planet that's not currently the subject of a freak show documentary on The Learning Channel. I don't know how this happened. I haven't been running wind sprints with plastic bags around my feet. I haven't been trudging through the swamps of Vietnam. I haven't recently let my toes rest in a rich slurry of top soil, sleet, and manure.

So what gives? Why you fucking with me, my feet? Just who exactly do you think you are???

Man, I don't even know what's going on anymore. The world is just crazy. Feet be hurtin', blog be giving me troubles, there's a dead guy in my hallway that I'm pretty sure I killed in a dream BUT NOW HE'S REAL!!! (don't want to get into it)

Life, man... am I right?!?!

But how are you doing. Let's have a conversation. About the aforementioned blog posts, yes, but about YOU as well. How's your life in this, these troubled times? Let's get a dialogue going! Let's connect on an emotional level, guys!!! We can DO THIS!!!

I'll start...

"Hello, readers... I'm C-dog, as you know. I am pretty awesome, but could stand to be a lot awesomer. I'm eating Salt & Vinegar chips right now."

Now you go. I eagerly await your reply.

18 Comments:

Blogger lacochran said...

Dear C-dog,

Thanks for your missive of this Februrary 10. Salt & Vinegar chips are the best chips evah.

I'm not so interested in any of those topics. Sorry. Could you do something on athlete's foot?

Oh.

-lacochran (feel free to reply on my blog)

10:39 AM  
Anonymous youaretigerbait said...

CELEBRITY SANDWICHES. i would eat the shit out of Scarlet Johannsen's sandwich.

10:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I vote for the long promised conclusion to the zombie/liquor store in basement tale.....plus the clean-up of the blogroll as well....

11:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I vote for the long promised conclusion to the zombie/liquor store in basement tale.....plus the clean-up of the blogroll as well....

11:04 AM  
Anonymous ML said...

C-Dog,

I'm sorry to hear about your feet, but dude, we've been telling you to put on a clean pair of socks for weeks now. You really shouldn't be surprised.

I'm doing alright. I could stand to be a little more awesome as well, but I suppose that if my biggest problem right now is deciding how I'm going to incorporate bacon into my next meal w/o having to make it, then I'm doing just fine.

If you could make a celebrity sandwich with bacon on it, I would eat it. I would probably hit the Scarlet Johannsen sandwich as well. I don't do girls, but let's face it, she's hot. And we look alike according to some people I used to work with, so it's okay if it's kind of like doin' yourself right? I mean eating. Yourself. ...right?

So I'm voting for celebrity sandwiches. It will give me an idea of how to incorporate bacon into lunch every day.

-MLo

11:07 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

I go with idea #2 because it looks like that will require the greatest effort on your part and I’m not one to let folks off easy.

Re: your athlete’s foot (feet?). It’s like when I go back to Ohio. The only ones wearing running suites are the people who have never jogged a day in their lives.

11:17 AM  
OpenID popomaticjeff said...

I'm voting for the interview with Lord Humongous. I'm sure he has a lot of helpful hints on surviving the apocalypse.

However, celebrity sandwiches sounds good also but that's probably because I'm hungry at the moment. I'm going to have lunch and think it over.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Bill From Gainesville said...

Celebrity Sandwhiches are my vote. Thanks for asking it makes me feel like my voice has been heard and that people out in the world care about what I think!-
-
Life is going okay, I have this thing I want to talk about but it would take a long time to just give all the background so that you could be up to date when I finally got to the whole point. I thought about blogging about it but it involves my Ex-wife and she sometimes reads it --- This is the stuff you would tell a Girlfriend but I dont have a girlfriend so it has to be bottled up. Thats how I am doing .

1:07 PM  
Blogger The Imaginary Reviewer said...

Hello, first time reader, first time commenter. I like the second option.

Oh, and I'm not going to steal your ideas, but the phrase "I will kill you in your face" has been noted in my Big Book of Things I'm to Start Saying All the Time. Hope this is okay.

1:15 PM  
Blogger Lioux said...

Ummm. #2. Celebrity Sandwiches.

Doye.

I'm also enjoying all the '#2' talk in the running commentary.

1:59 PM  
Blogger Jack Burden said...

Given a choice between anything and Lord Humongous, I always go for Lord Humongous. The man's got style.

2:05 PM  
Blogger jason quinones said...

i'm still waiting for you to finish your liquor run story....

but if i had to choose...the Lord Humongous gets my vote! if for nothing else than to imagine you in assless chaps.

3:51 PM  
Blogger Sapphire said...

I love the celebrity Sammichez idea XD haha (and lol @ tigerbait's comment)

About your athlete's foot, I hope you're using cream and/or spray for it , cuz it's very contagious and you don't want it in other places... *a-herm* ... spray all your shoes and socks and wash all your socks. Don't walk around barefoot :( . I cought it when I was 15 at cadet camp, and it's a bitch to get rid of. Remember, it's a fungus, so you gotta kill it.

As for my life? I had to go bring my 14 month old boy for his shots today :( I felt like a bad person lol. good thing I drugged the shit out of him with baby tylenol before we went, he didn't really know what was going on lol.

I want more sleep... story of my life

<3

3:51 PM  
Blogger Lioux said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

6:02 PM  
Blogger Lioux said...

Hey everyone!....Come check out my new post on Celebrity Sandwiches!!!

6:04 PM  
Blogger Sonny Amou said...

Dude. Do the sandwiches. It's your wheelhouse. It beckons, o it does.

SA.

6:46 PM  
Blogger Big Daddy said...

Sammich FTW!

As for me personally, I am contemplating making a stop by Mickey D's for a Cheeseburger Happy Meal™.

6:47 PM  
Anonymous October said...

While I am one of the noted horny middle schoolers with a thing for fictional vampires, I'd go with the celebrity sandwiches. Can it be several celebrities stuck together and covered in onion dip? 'Cause that would be the best thing ever.

7:42 PM  

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