Friday Afternoon Hodgepodge

I just had quite possibly the worst burrito I've ever eaten. It came from the cafeteria here at my job and, supposedly, it contained chicken. Believe me when I say that it did not... instead, all it had inside was sweaty cheese, soggy "grilled" peppers and onions, and all the sorrow in Mexico. It tasted like the floor mat of my first car in High School and it looked like someone threw up a years worth of Taco Bell wrappers into a plastic container and called it "lunch" just to be ironic. Seriously, if I didn't have to work here every day, I'd go back down to the cafeteria and trash the place with my bare hands. I'm so glad I usually bring my lunch, I can't even tell you; I'd probably be dead from food poisoning or "the chronic scoots" otherwise. It's all cool though... tonight I'm eating German food. Sausage!

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I'm really excited about seeing Cloverfield this weekend! Anyone else? It looks really neat-o. Plus, I'm a sucker for movies that have the potential to give me motion sickness worse than that one time I went on a glass-bottomed boat in Hawaii. I puked on a dolphin and he went, "Hey buddy... glass-bottomed boat foul." I was sad for a little while, but then we did the hula and I ate some poi, and I learned that "mahalo" means family from a little blue alien. It was the best trip that I ever made up just now!!! So anyway, yeah... Cloverfield is going to kick ass. It has a monster!

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Sincere condolences from ZFS! to Lily Allen and Ed Simons. Shit's weak, and I know that's an understatement...



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I got all my deadlines done ahead of schedule, so now I've got like three hours to kill before I can say "see ya" to this working week and say "howdy" to the Martin Luther King-Approved Long Weekend. How do I know that Martin Luther King approves of this weekend? Two words: Ouija Board. I can also tell you that Socrates thinks Cloverfield looks awesome too, even though Amerigo Vespucci thinks it looks like a Blair Witch ripoff and that he bets you don't even get to see the monster. Amerigo Vespucci is such a fucking asshole. Did you know that America was really supposed to be named after his first mate, who actually set foot on the continent first, but Vespucci snuck into the Continent Naming Office and switched all the forms around. It's true! That's why we're called America instead of "Dave Gunderson-topia."

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Man, I could go for some candy right now. Somebody bring me some candy. I don't care what kind. As long as it's not toffee-based. Anything else, though... oh wait, no licorice. Licorice is for people who think candy should taste like punishment. Oooh, bring me Twizzlers!!! Or Nerds!!! Ooooh... I WANT COW TAILS!!!