Thursday, August 28, 2008

A Few Questions Regarding Some Controversial Art



According to a recent Reuters news story, the above sculpture... which, as you can see, depicts a crucified frog holding an egg and a beer mug... has been condemned by the Pope as blasphemous. Herewith, some discussion questions regarding the situation, as well as the object du art itself...

-What, the Pope's got NOTHING better to do than sit around condemning art all day? I mean, shouldn't he be telling the gays where to get off or glossing over stories of handsy priests? At the very least, it seems that his time would be better spent scouring the Vatican yellow pages for a haberdashery with reasonable rates.

-Art? More like FART!!! HA HA HA HAHA HA HAHA HA!!! Goddammit I should write for the New York Motherfucking Times or some shit! So, so talented... anyway, but yeah that's an ugly sculpture. All green and whatever. And the face looks like YOUR MOM HA HA HA HAHA HA HA HA HAHAHA!!!! *SNAP*

-So, does anyone actually know what happens when the Pope condemns something? Like, does it get struck by lightning from Jesus or locked away with the DaVinci Code in a vault somewhere? Or is it really just that the Pope gets all huffy, bangs his Pope-gavel a few times, and that's it? Yeah, I bet it's the last one. Pope all red-faced and stomping around his palace, threatening to hold his breath 'til he turns blue n' junk... he's just cranky because he missed his nap. His Pope-nap.

-Hey! Hey Mr. Frog Guy!!! Why don't you give me some of that beer?!?! C'mon, share ya beer!!! You can keep the egg. But the beer, man... the beer!!! Help a brother out, you warty bastard!

8 Comments:

Blogger jason quinones said...

well at least he's wearing a loin cloth! becuz a nude crucified frog jesus would be totally over the top!

i 'm surprised that the museum showcasing this "art" was in italy. cuz like , jesus is like fucking huge there!

11:01 AM  
Blogger jason quinones said...

since i don't know how to link articles in the comments section i'll just ask you to please google...

"clifton new jersey shinobi warriors"

these guys are begging for a ZFS! style write up!

the cliftonjournal.com has the whole story with pics of the "ninjas"!

11:08 AM  
Blogger Lioux said...

Oh Clinton, Pope condemned things usually end up in gay men's homes.

Doye.

11:39 AM  
Blogger brookLyn gaL said...

Mr. Frog Guy? I'm pretty sure that's Kermit.

11:44 AM  
Blogger The Unbearable Banishment said...

If the Pope is so upset, he should put on his big purple hat, wave his magic popely scepter, make the frog come to life and get down off that cross all by himself. That’d give him some street cred that couldn’t be easily scoffed at.

12:35 PM  
Blogger Clinton said...

Jason... I totally saw that! The guy that sits next to me is from Jersey, so whenever something wacky happens there, I tease him about it. As does he in return when it's wacky shit from Texas.

Lioux... Good to know. I thought I saw the Piss Christ in the home of a gay couple I know.

Brooklyn... Retarded Kermit, maybe.

The UB... What would also give the Pope street cred? Actually doing something.

1:00 PM  
Blogger ML said...

bah. pope. whatev', dude. every time they try to crucify something (in art ... or otherwise?), some crazy christian gets offended.

i'd say that the frog is representative of the complacent people who put themselves on a cross, trying to make themselves look better, when really they're just ...making eggs? the point being .. it ISN'T a reference to Jesus. not EVERYTHING is a reference to Jesus.

5:32 PM  
Anonymous Just Saying said...

Clint,

When you die and end up in hell, make sure GF packs your coffin with the Pizza pockets. They should get nice and gooey on the inside and crispy on the out, down there. I'll bring the Cerveza.

11:17 PM  

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