Your eyes do not deceive; it's like Ramen, but cheese-flavored. I'm eating it as I type this (I multi-task like a motherfucker) and it's... well... it's not bad. Let me start by saying that; it certainly compares favorably to the other varieties of Ramen-esque lunches that I've had in the past. It tastes, actually, a lot like Cheeze Doodles, which is partly where the problem that I''m having lies. See, the thing is, a man's lunch shouldn't be disconcertingly flavored like something else. It would be the same if you ate a cheeseburger that tasted like a chicken sandwich; food-wise, they're in the same ballpark, but they're distinctly from opposite sides of the stands, if you get my meaning, and they should stay that way. My opinion, of course, but I feel I'm on solid ground.
Also a problem, it's got the same soupiness of a regular, everyday bowl of Ramen. That is to say, it's watery. It's cheese-flavored water that I'm currently sipping and that's just... weird. It's like if you walked into your apartment after a day at work and found that all of your furniture had been moved a couple of inches to the left; that feeling of not-quite-rightness is prevalent and it's made for the lunch-time equivalent of a waking dream.
Oh, and there are weird little green bits floating in the water, too. Evidence of a lost civilization? Flakes of interstellar matter that have drifted down from the atmosphere? Parsley? I think I'm better off not knowing.
Anyway, I've finished it and I feel pleasingly full. I'm going to eat a couple of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups now. I expect no trouble from them.
I LOVE Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't trust a person that didn't. In fact, I'm pretty sure that's how we'll be able to tell the aliens from the humans when we invade. Aliens find them "too sweet."
ReplyDeleteReese's Peanut Butter Cups are my favorite!
ReplyDeleteCheeder Cheese Ramen though? I'm pretty certain that most Ramen has a shelf life of - Eat Before The Apocalypse, but I would have checked on this one.
Believe me when I say that the cheese present in this Ramen was a long ways away from anything even remotely resembling stuff that once sprang forth from a cow.
ReplyDeleteThose foam cheese-wedges that Packers fans wear on their heads? Closer to real cheese than this powedery substance.
It was probably some Pre-Cambrian era prototype Ramen packed with cheese flavored escherichia coli bacteria.
ReplyDeleteThat's funny, I just said the exact same thing! Well, actually, what I said was, "This cheze be lik reel old. N'stuff."
ReplyDeleteBut it's pretty close.
I didn't realize you spoke Ebonics! What is up my homeboy?!?!?
ReplyDeleteNot Ebonics. Just stupid. Parenthetically, is Ebonics still a "thing?" Like, didn't that go out as a language concept as quickly as it was introduced?
ReplyDeleteI think it just went "underground"...
ReplyDeleteJudging from your description of this cheesy meal, I'd rather eat a Cobbler-Dog.
ReplyDeleteMaybe if you use less water it'd be more like macaroni and cheese as envisioned by the Cheez Doodle people? That doesn't sound half bad at all.
ReplyDeleteJeff... Yes, eat more Cobblerdogs! They're really putting the pressure on me, here. With lead pipes!
ReplyDeleteSloth... See, the thing is, I filled it up EXACTLY to the line in the cup where they told me to. I think they want me to have weird cheese-water. For whatever reason.
I like Reese's Peanut Butter cups only when they're of the right consistency. There's nothing worse than biting into a RBPC where the chocolate is mushy and the peanut butter has the consistency of sawdust. Blech.
ReplyDeleteomg that looks SO GOOD. I always water down my velveta + salsa. It's a trick i learned from my Southern girl best friend, it makes the goodness last that much longer :)
ReplyDelete-Jew
Too bad the green flakes aren't black tar heroin.
ReplyDeleteCheesewater sounds like a fun band name.
I need to tell Britney about this Doodle Ramen. She loves her some cheeze doodles.
Maybe you should add MORE water and make a hot cheesy beverage!
ReplyDeleteGiggleloop... The ones I've got were part of a candy jar-type affair that a TV station sent me as a thank you for getting them paid on time (it happens). They're kind of melty and oily, but still quite delicious.
ReplyDeleteJew... That sounds kind of like my favorite Watching Sports snack: Velvetta, spicy salsa, and browned, seasoned ground beef all mixed together in an orgy of yum
Big Daddy... Also, The Cheesy Ramens.
Lioux... That's pretty much what I had already. And it was ick.
those green flaky bits? - they're people
ReplyDeleteThrow some booze in that hot cheesy beverage and I might try it.
ReplyDeletePlaying Ugly... I thought they tasted like the repressed masses. Where's Chuck when you need him?
ReplyDeleteJeff... I had this cheese dip one time that was made from beer. It was I'd died from a heartattack and I didn't care.
"Cheezy Ramen is made of People! People!"
ReplyDeleteGirlfriend... I never noticed that you were Charlton Heston. Odd.
ReplyDeleteDigital... Soylent Gross.
Soylent Yellow-Orange?
ReplyDeleteTried to fix my spelling mistake...ack!
ReplyDeleteHave you ever had Beer Cheddar soup? Sounds gross but boy howdy, is it tasty!
ReplyDeleteDigital... Were it not for spellcheck, people would think this blog was written by a semi-trained ape.
ReplyDeleteJeff... Yes, actually. They made a version of it at Whole Foods when I worked there. You're right: Quite tasty.
This soup sounds AMAZING!!!
ReplyDeleteHave an AWESOME trip...in Chicago.
Clinton, Hopefully you will have some beer cheddar soup ...in Chicago. Have a great trip!
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should save up the leftover cheese-flavored water and, after a couple more Ramens, you could just use cheese water to cook it. Yum! Death by Cheese!
ReplyDeleteBon Voyage! Have a good trip!
ReplyDeleteCheesy Water?!! I am going to be sick now !!
ReplyDeleteI bet you could make a good dip out of the flavor powder, though. Just add sour cream!
ReplyDelete